Mothers and Brides: 3 Tips for Happily-Ever-After Wedding Planning

Wedding planning can really put a strain on a relationship--and not just the one between a bride and groom. Just as most brides have dreamed of their wedding day, most mothers of girls have dreamed of seeing their daughters walk down the aisle. When those dreams conflict, what should be a joyful time for everyone can become a tearful one. Here are some tips for keeping all your wedding tears happy.

1. Money Matters. 
Wedding dreams often run up against financial realities. Before the wedding train starts gathering steam, all parties involved should set a budget and understand what it allows for. Then, adjust expectations: brides shouldn't expect to have their parents pick up the tab for everything without having some input; mothers of the bride should understand that paying for all or part of their daughter's wedding doesn't mean they get to call all the shots. One of brides' most common complaints is that their moms try to seize control of the wedding planning.

2. Guest List Graciousness
Whether it's your wedding or your daughter's, it's a big day, one that you want to share with all the important people in your life. Depending on the couple's desire for a large or small wedding, the budget, and the size of the families, hard choices may need to be made on the guest list. Brides should expect to allot some of the spaces on the list to close friends of their parents. Moms shouldn't abuse the privilege, though. Their friends will understand, especially if they're told in advance, "Bob and Ann are on a budget and really have to limit their guest list." If Mom can't bear for the whole garden club to be excluded from the celebration, she can always host a tea or second reception at a later date.

3. Something Old, Something New (Your Daughter's Wedding is not About You) 
Weddings are times of tradition, and many a mother has saved her wedding gown in the hopes her daughter would one day wear it. It's often beautiful to see something from the past carried into the future, but mothers of the bride should understand if their daughters don't attach the same meaning to that fingertip veil circa 1974 that they do. If there are one or two things that are really meaningful to a MOB, she should present the ideas to her daughter as a suggestion, not a mandate. The more you ask for in this situation, the less you're likely to get. And daughters--consider honoring reasonable wedding requests from your mother. Sooner than you think, you may be standing in her shoes, trying to help your daughter plan her dream wedding. 

Written by Rebecca King ~ Copyright © 2012 exclusively for Atmosphere Productions

Atmosphere Productions LLC is a CT Wedding DJ, providing professional mobile entertainment service, Music, Reception Entertainment Directors, MC and DJ's primarily for Weddings in the Greater Hartford area but throughout Connecticut, Massachusetts, New York, Rhode Island and in the New England area.

Specializing in wedding disc jockey entertainment, radio & club dj's, corporate and business events, photo booth rentals, ceremony musicians, strolling violinist, guitarist, cocktail & chamber musicians, custom lighting, custom song editing and voice-over services.

For further information visit our website at
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